In our customary fearless fashion we have performed a thorough review of Frank Kern's Mass Control System, and here is our verdict:
Frank Kern's Mass Control Sucks
Now we haven't been provided with a free review copy by Frank, in much the same way as Michael Koenigs failed to provide us with a free trial of his Traffic Geyser service, so how can we be so hasty in our judgement given that the product doesn't launch for another hour. At least when we declared that Affiliate Video Brander sucks we had tried the product. We even made a video demonstrating it's shortcomings.
Well, it's all down to the marketing. We're very familiar with the way the pay per click game works, and if you've been following our progress here on our blog you'll see we learn fast. These days we're no slouches at the natural search game either. The fake review page, such as Frank Kern's http://www.masscontrolreview.com, is familiar territory for us. How can we sure it belongs to Frank you may ask. It's got his picture on it, sure, but as we well know using an affiliate video brander is all the rage these days. Well it's an educated guess, but Frank provides a link to the site in yesterdays press release "Mass Control Marketing Revealed By Maniac Surfer Frank Kern".
Now let's go take a look at the search listings in the run up to zero hour by first of all doing a Google search for Mass Control. MassControlReview.com is right there on the first page at number 5. This time let's search for Frank Kern Mass Control. You can see at number 4 in the paid search listings an ad entitled Frank Kern Sucks? Now this is a title we'll be going to use later on if we find a need to give our traffic an emergency boost. The thing is though, if you clicked on our ad you'll end up on this post, which is undeniably of the opinion that Frank Kern sucks. Now click on that other ad. You'll end up on another fake review page that says "A brutally honest review of Frank Kern's Mass Control." However for some strange reason there is an affiliate link at the bottom saying "Click Here to Invest in Mass Control AND get your Limited Bonuses" in big blue letters.
Excuse me just a moment. It's less than 45 minutes to launch, so I'm going to go away and click publish, and come back and finish this post after I've had a cup of coffee. Always assuming I'm not feeling too sick to drink it, of course.
P.S. I never did get to drink that cup of coffee. Not for the reason you're thinking though. I watched our search results for an hour or so, firing off emails with progress reports. We got to number 1 on Google for our longest tail target keyphrase before that hour was over.
Content with that I went for a walk with Dave, the amazing guy who does the music for our internet videos. It was good to clear the stench from our nostrils. The sun had already gone down, so we didn't make it all the way to Traffic Heaven. Nestled in the hills, gazing out towards the ocean with a fresh breeze in our faces, a nagging thought started at the back of my mind. Some people might find it disturbing, but in all the circumstances I found it remarkably refreshing.
"What if the masses don't want to be controlled?"
Filed under Internet Marketing by on Feb 1st, 2008. 7 Comments. 
As our regular readers will know, here at WWW Gurus we like to keep close tabs on our position in the natural search rankings. In the course of this research I stumbled upon a wonderful blog post entitled Affiliate Video Brander – What a piece of …
Since reading it I've been wondering what Dave had in mind for those dots in his title. Maybe you've been asking yourself that question too? To try and settle the issue once and for all I've set up our very own Affiliate Video Brander poll, which you can see over to the right of this post. Please cast your vote and let us know your opinion on this contentious matter. We'll keep you updated as the voting progresses.
Unfortunately the Internet Marketers Anonymous web site seems to be having some connectivity issues at the moment. Who knows, maybe another marketer with the same host is having a big launch today? Nonetheless I urge you to keep on trying if you can't get through at first. The post is the best thing I've read on the internet for a very long time. In case you have problems accessing the site, here is the video from YouTube that led me there:
On to the results of my natural search research. Currently our YouTube video about Affiliate Video Brander has moved up to number 5 on a Google Video search for affiliate video brander. YouTube limits videos to 10 minutes duration, so we have uploaded a longer version of the video to Google Video itself. After being processed at Google the quality is less than wonderful, but nevertheless it is ranked at number 7. Dave's video is ranked at 8.
Filed under Audio Visual by on Jan 26th, 2008. 6 Comments.
Today Joel Comm has launched a new product called The Secret Classroom. It is the home study version of The Next Internet Millionaire internet reality show.
If you've been following this blog for a while you'll know that here at World Wide Web Gurus we are big fans of Mark Joyner and his simpleology courses. You will also know that we are attempting to demonstrate how to earn money on the internet without spending any first. This launch presents us with an opportunity to try and combine these two passions of ours. We are affiliates of Joel, and can therefore earn money by selling his products. In addition Mark Joyner was the first real life internet millionaire to appear on the show. He was teaching the 12 contestants how to use the techniques he teaches in simpleology to organize their time better and so become vastly more productive.
Now normally for a big launch like this we'd buy some pay per click advertising, but that is against the rules for this project. We'll see if we can find out what is possible without paying for any clicks, or any other form of advertising come to that.
Watch this space!
Filed under Internet Marketing by on Dec 5th, 2007. Comment.
